Thursday, July 31, 2008.

showcase portfolio.

till today i had this notion that showcase portfolio was the dumbest project ever, beating even well-known retarded projects. what's the point, i asked. true, it may be a way do develop one's ability to showcase one's CV later in life, but in front of your other friends, all of whom would have done the same things as you (and maybe even done them better)?

that was tantamount to a self-glorification ego-boosting exercise, which NO ONE likes.

but then today's presentations convinced me otherwise, especially dennis' presentation.

he showed us that showcase portfolio isn't JUST about results, that it isn't just about the amount of gold amassed via trophies throughout the 4 years in RI. He made the intangible tangible, we felt how much more he grew as a person, and we were impressed.

That's it - showcase portfolio is how much one grows. Not just through brain cells, but many other ways.

Cause now i know that i don't have to worry about ego-boosting stuff (cause i can't), because no one else would have developed exactly like me. I will be presenting to show the world how RI has developed me, and to show the world my life journey, which is unique and special.

results are but secondary.

and in that light, i think showcase portfolio is one of the best assignments ri has ever given us.


anyway amc was bad. but never mind.

english was not too bad though. free spammage (especially when i did that for geog and more recently ss-socdoc).

Labels: school

{ 10:14 PM }

Wednesday, July 30, 2008.

I FEEL SOOO ACCOMPLISHED.

yes i am still noob in reading html, but at least it didn't look THAT greek-ish to me.

i always wanted some non-super-emo blogskin, so i thought this would do well.

comments very much appreciated, thanks!

anyway back to yesterday's disastrous chem pract.

i dunno how someone can screw up in as many ways as me.

1 - i got an 84% of O in KClOx (cause i stupidly multiplied by 2)

2 - i decided it was NOT realistic. so i guessed that Cl was +5 oxidation state. So when i named the compound, i named it POTASSIUM (V)CHLORATE. who freaking puts the oxidation state in front of the species?

3 - and while guessing the chemical formula i was thinking +5 +5 (Cl's oxidation state) so i put formula as KClO5.

and the one that takes the cake:

4 - i was despo. so i decided to continue from where i left off from 1. i did my calculations, and got
KClO22.

repeat:
KClO22.

so i just discovered something which has an oxidation state of +41.
life is sooooooo fun.

Labels: blog, school

{ 8:42 PM }

Tuesday, July 29, 2008.

this blog needs cleaning. period.

*maid! clean the blog for me!*
*yes sir.*

ok that was totally random (not as if i have maids (rather, domestic helpers (as my pri sch science teacher prefers it)) at home).

anyway this blog is just like someone who just got back from 50-day obs or something like that.

full of inner material (as in not as if the inner material is good), yet outer coating needs some hard polishing.

so i shall start (by end of dmp i will, WILL finish this) to revamp my blog. -partly inspired by weng hong and his quite-cool blog design, though the pictures are slightly screwed-up

1st. links.
2nd. random descriptions.
3rd. blogskin BLOGSKIN.

someone who has a vague idea of how to translate html to english could help millions.

and if anyone has any ideas of blogskin please tell. i'm rather idea-less now, in part due to my discovery of KClO22.

Labels: blog

{ 10:36 PM }

Sunday, July 27, 2008.

life revolves around the x-axis and the volume of life that is formed after 1 revolution around the x axis is equal to


ok that was lame.

when you start seeing stars as integrals you know you need to be whacked on the head with a chem textbook.

then you see more particles travelling with some weird velocities, and wonder whether these particles are the same.

ahh. to leibniz-land calculus goes. which means,
bye bye calculus i hate you.

Labels: school

{ 10:01 PM }

Friday, July 25, 2008.

too bad chentian. i have to do this.

-placeholder-

ok that was lame.
but that's the subject of this totally random post.

Labels: friends

{ 9:48 PM }

Tuesday, July 22, 2008.

ok we just had the coolest maffra lesson in like, years.

normally we don't do anything much in lesson besides normal routine stuff (which includes ivan loh being spastic) but today was something wrong, which began with this:

HY smiles in class (as in he doesn't make a conscious effort to smile)

Mr. Kwa: Huiyao, why are you smiling?

Then disaster came, which had to do with a green marker and a unit vector. The whole class laughed like some maniacs (vincent hy jeremy and I (aka the back right) couldn't stop laughing for like very long).

It was soooooo disastrous.

Philo was not too bad, but it was havokish - i can't really control my mouth well eh.

Went to esplanade library yesterday to get new stuff. Seems I frequent esplanade library more than i go to some other places (which is indeed freaky) - i think i might have compulsive cd-collecting disorder.

ok this post is getting nowhere.

Labels: school

{ 7:25 PM }

Sunday, July 20, 2008.

ok something just happened.

it was supposed to be between 2 ppl, but now involves 5 ppl.

this is HILARIOUS.

Labels: Life

{ 9:27 PM }

Saturday, July 19, 2008.

edited note (20/07) -

arrgh how i wish blogger was as good as livejournal.

I was planning to actually minimise this post, such that everyone who wanted to see it could see and everyone who did not want to see it could choose not to.

Call me mad, but I thought that was a really good idea.

I blogsurf a lot, and I start my daily dosage of blogsurfing by starting from my blog (duh).

To be honest, I can't bear to read this post again. I couldn't even bear to read Renhao's email to the Sec4s.

Letting go is just that tough.

note: This will not be posted to the RISE-08 yahoogroups, cause I see no need to spam the rest of the members with my droning and reminiscing, and that they wouldn't like it too. If you (actually, and thank you) find it worthy to be read by the rest of the CCA, feel free to post it on the egroups. If you intend to post it (which I would be honoured to see you do so), please do not post the postscript (for obvious reasons). Thanks.

To all fellow members of RISE:
This would have been my 12th email post in my history of RISE (see above), and will perhaps (barring other circumstances) be my last ever. What I experience now is perhaps something which you will probably only get to experience when you are like me, writing my last mail to all of you.

Last year, 2 of my seniors, Yu Zhou and Xue Qian (two whom I admire most deeply for their undying commitment and passion to RISE) wrote a similar farewell message, thanking everyone for a wonderful 4 years they had. And so I am here today as well, to thank each and every one of you, for teaching me so much these 4 years, and giving me a 2nd home for me to live in.

In Sec 1, I remembered the times I had playing Bridge with some of my fellow current-Sec 4s as well as my seniors. I was led in (prematurely, and wrongly, I think now) into this CCA by then-chairman, Jing Xun, who taught me all I had to know about RISE.

In Sec 2, Remus and Kevin left a great impression on me as I further got to know many more people and help the juniors (among which are some members of the 2009 ExCo (you know who :) ) join this great CCA. As I struggled to fit into my class, I found solace in my CCA, who had people of the same wavelength as me.

In Sec 3, I experienced SYF full-blast for the 1st time, and that was probably the hardest point of my life so far. The torturous practices, intense atmosphere and whatnot left me defenseless and frightened, but we managed to pull through, all 50++ of us, and got a standing ovation at Carnegie (which I hope I'll never forget for the rest of my life.)

The night before SYF, I remember myself with Shawn Neo and Mr. Ong (and someone, if you remember who you are tell me) at S11, very anxious about the next day. That was perhaps the 1st time in my life I ever felt like sacrificing all for my CCA, as everyone felt the pressure as a CCA. Shawn comforted me even as he had to undergo much more pressure than me (as concertmaster), and I truly felt how great my seniors were.

Now, in Sec 4, I stand here hoping I did leave a mark like my seniors. Through my constant nagging and bugging, I hope I managed to impact just one junior, for that would be enough. I, as a senior, feel that if my seniors managed to leave a mark on me, for me to succeed as a senior, I must have had impacted at least 1 junior.

And I hope I have succeeded. Only time will tell.

These 4 years have given me so much, in terms of memories, and there are people that can never be repaid even after countless times of thanking. Nevertheless, these people must be thanked.

1) Mr. Sze, for all your guidance and support. With you, we are what we are today, and I thank you sincerely for that.

2) Ms. Shen, for the behind-the-scenes admin. Working with you this year was a blessing for me, and I admire your dedication to our CCA.

3) Mr. Ong, for your tireless work in this CCA. Though you may know not that much as Ms. Shen or Mr. Sze, you still dedicate so much of your time (when you could have been marking my chem assignments or sleeping) to RISE, and for that, I salute you.

4) The ExCo of 2008, namely, Kai Cheng, Shang Xuan, Zhao Kai and Ben Wee, for all the crap you had to endure from me (especially Kai Cheng!) and all the support you gave me. Without you guys, RISE would never have achieved anything at all. We should go out for a drink sometime eh?

5) All my seniors for inspiring me in every way. Special mention MUST go out to Jing Xun, Sam Lim (the older one, not the younger one), Shawn Chang, Dom Seet, Remus, Kevin, Shawn Neo, Yu Zhou, David, Yiyang, Wang Xiang, Xue Qian, Adriel, Matthew, Yu Ze, Cheng Han, Nick Hsien, and Kuangnan for all that you have done for me, and I hope I have manaed to emulate you all this year.

6) Everyone in RISE now, my batchmates and my juniors, especially the ExCo '09, for making my years in RISE such a blast.

Now, as I stand here uttering my last words, I wish to impart some words of advice (how qualified I am to say these, I do not know), and I hope all of us can improve as a CCA (even when I am not around).

To the Sec 1s and those who joined us this year (Shuhuan) - Perhaps I won't ever officially work with you all again, but I hope you guys can help the next batch of Sec 1s assimilate into RISE easier. Next year will be a roller-coaster year for everyone (including me I hope), so stay strong, believe in one other (as I realised myself too, one's best friends in CCA will 100% be batchmates), and never give up. Whatever you do, you guys must make more friends, and make those bonds (not chem again. sigh.) stronger as you undergo what I would say is one of the hardest 6 months. Never give up!

To the Sec 2s: You guys will be Sec 3s, the long-pants users, and will lead the juniors for most part next year. The juniors will be lost, and you will be the beacon for them. Guide them through next year's tough life, teach them, speak to them (like how Shawn did so to me), show them the light and make them feel wanted in this CCA. The ExCo '09 needs you guys, and please help them through next year.

To the non-ExCo Sec 3s: You guys will be the biggest seniors, people whom the future Sec1s look up to, and people who are the best (in technical skills). As I told you guys privately during campaigning, please do help the ExCo no matter what. They need you guys, and the ensemble needs you guys. Give your heart and soul in RISE, for even if you don't get your CCA points you might have deserved (like Yu Zhou and Xue Qian), you at least get the respect from your juniors, which will last you forever.

To the ExCo of 2009: Hold on tight guys. Being in the ExCo requires dedication (which I can see in you all), hard work and teamwork. No matter what comes your way, do stay together as an ExCo and stay strong, even in the face of adversity. Lead the ensemble, inspire them and guide them through the rough seas of next year. And no matter what, remember - As (I know it's not good to quote this, but I find it particularly apt) Albus Dumbledore said (adapted), "You will always find that help will always be given at RISE to those who ask for it."

And to all of you,
The Sec 4s are leaving RISE, leaving behind this wonderful CCA in all of your hands. Do take care of it, and while you do so, learn from it and its vast treasures,
and (yeah, perhaps clichéd, but most apt),

Auspicium Melioris Aevi.

Lumpy
P.S. I teared one drop or two when I wrote this.

Why, I'm not too sure.

Is it because I miss RISE? Or is it because I feel insecure having to leave?

As Daron (Chairman '09) wrote yesterday on his blog (and I quote (w/o permission),)

"RISE BBQ last night, albeit mad and insane with the water bombs and all, left me feeling quite empty and sad after that.

after this we wouldn't have the sec 4s there anymore to help us and lead us, and now the weight of leading the ensemble has been passed to us.

it's sad, really. ): will really miss the sec4s, but i guess it's all part and parcel of growing up. promise to lead the ensemble to greater heights, or at least i hope :D"

And as I read this, I realised I had the exact same feeling he had when I was Sec 3.

Let me turn back the clock, and I would gladly join RISE 500 times over. Let me turn back the clock, and I would mark down with enthusiasm the period 3.30-6.30 on my timetable. Let me turn back the clock, and I would want to get water-bombed by everyone again.

Why, oh why, is leaving so difficult?

And as I ask myself why, I play Mahler's 9th symphony. The whole idea of his 9th was about how one accepts death, and leaving from this world.

It may sound too abstract, but that's exactly how I feel now.

And I thank RISE for having introduced me to this world of classical music.

Thank you RISE. I'll miss you.

Labels: CCA

{ 9:30 PM }

Thursday, July 17, 2008.

this is inspired by a facebook comment on my email.

So i read that comment, and decided to look through my sent emails. Indeed, i found a change in me as i went along. At the start, I sounded so neutral, but as time progressed, I developed this sarcastic humour in my emails.

For the same event (BBQ) for 2 different years, these are my emails:
Year 2007-
Year 2008-
Hi all,

Due to the anticipated questions regarding the BBQ site (it IS quite ulu, as far as I see it), I have decided to post a guide on how to get there. For most of you (who are going LANning), this should be of not much of a problem (as 1 ExCo or 2 will certainly guide you), but for the rest, I sincerely advice you to READ THIS (or else you WILL die - and I'll not entertain calls from lost RI students).

Anyway, if you DO have problems (cannot open file, cannot edit file, cannot get your bum out of house cause of increase of size during APCG holiday etc.), do email ME (NOT THE EGROUPS) and I will entertain your query. And anyway, for those of you who encounter the abovementioned problems, i advise you to either - ask me to send the file again, ask me to send the file again, go to some liposuction clinic, respectively.

Lumpy

PS. Pay Weng Hong OR ELSE.
(for obvious reasons i didn't upload the contents of the file - i know someone by the name of ****** *** will attempt to gatecrash it)

Now we see. I grew more sarcastic and developed this dry sense of humour, compared to the old me. Why so? Did i grow overconfident and over-ego? Perhaps. Or is it just that I feel more comfortable sending out this kind of emails now?

We'll see.

Interesting isn't it? Mails can chronicle a person's development quite well eh?

Labels: Life

{ 12:08 AM }

Sunday, July 13, 2008.

ok i shall post about rage 13 using 2 sides of my brain - the musical side and the non-musical side.

non-musical side:
I was using this side of my brain after intermission, and that was when i went mad and randomly screamed some people's names out (coughHUIYAOcough). Clearly i enjoyed this part of the concert cause i just took it not too seriously (think rock concert) and enjoyed the energy that was oozing out from the audience and RIGE. so in that aspect my non-musical brain would like to thank RIGE for a splendid non-musical performance that seriously entertained me (without the music).

musical side:
To be honest, I seriously doubt my brain's capability from differentiating guitar music from standard classical music. So throughout the 1st half i was using the brain that was sooo accustomed to assessing classical music standards to grade the performance (and attempt to enjoy), and the results were not very ideal. I left for intermission with the (very wrong, i would say) mindset that guitar music is un-enjoyable, and thought of A LOT of aspects RIGE might had been able to improve in. BUT i seriously think this is unique to me alone (look i dont enjoy piano music as much too cause i'm not trained in piano and i think like the guitar, the piano has this overly-percussive sound that dampens the flow of musical lines - someone convince me otherwise), so maybe, JUST maybe, i shouldn't be using my musical side of my brain for EVERY musical concert I go to, cause I miss out on the more satisfying rewards.

Anyway I sincerely thought RAGE 13 was great, and kudos to EugeneGan and ChewKengChee + every other RIGE member (too many to mention) for entertaining me well!

Labels: Music, school

{ 11:41 PM }

Saturday, July 12, 2008.

ok. so i was listening to mahler 6 and its wonderful 3 hammer blows (refer to my pm).

so i decided to forward to the last bars of the last mvt.

All was soft, with lower strings, lower brasses and bassoon + timpani holding a chord.

So naturally cause everything was soft, what do people do? they TURN UP the volume.

bad move.

just right AFTER i turned up the volume, something bad happened.

turns out mahler made this symphony so tragic by BLASTING the "fate" theme 1 last time as the whole symphony drew to a close, symbolising the hero's loss to Fate.

and now my ears kinda hurt a little.

ouch.

Labels: Music

{ 10:47 PM }

Wednesday, July 9, 2008.

side note 1-tmr is mufti day. I SHALL WEAR CONCERT ATTIRE TO SCH. maybe not. anyway i'll wear a 4B/RISE related t-shirt and dunno-what-pants (concert?) to sch.

side note 2-exco results out! gratz to the exco of 2009: chair - daron tan, vchair - tan renhao, qm - adi chew, librarian - jin chentian, treasurer - low weng hong. shan't comment much, but i think they can do well.

anyway i was feeling quite emo after the rhsl. was feeling sad not because of me missing rise (it wasn't that feeling) but of sth else.

so when i feel sad i turn to music. and just nice i was listening to mahler 9 quite recently. and mahler 9 is something one does not listen to at such a young age. it speaks of death and life, and was composed when mahler was dying (curse of the ninth - a self-prophecy?).

it is a really emotional work, dragging you to the depths and bringing you up just bars after. just the thing i need right now.

Labels: CCA, Life

{ 8:46 PM }

Thursday, July 3, 2008.

ok i feel suicidal.

MY BLARDY COMP CRASHED AND ALL 32GIG OF MUSIC DIED (with it i'm not too sure, HOPEFULLY NOT).

and moments before my comp crashed guess what i was listening to. mahler's 6th. TRAGIC SYMPHONY. how apt.

so the lucky option is that my comp gets repaired within 1-2 weeks and i miss out on the 24gig of music that isn't in my portable hard drive (which means my WHOLE stravinsky, vw and elgar collection).

the unlucky option is that my hard drive died on me and i lose ALL my 32gig of music. that means no stravinsky no vw no elgar no r-strauss no rostropovich collection no kleiberbrahms4. of which the absence of the latter means i should really go and die.

ahh i dunno how to rebuild my library if the unlucky option turns out.

Labels: Life

{ 10:42 PM }